Family

Aiden drew this picture and shared it with me the other day.

Family.

That's what he titles it.

The great thing about this picture is that he didn't just draw him and me. But he included friends and loved ones who surround him with joy all the time.

I remember when I started out on this single mom journey. At first, I was so worried that Aiden would feel a sense of deprivation or would feel as though he's growing up without a "real" family. I studied the statistics on kids raised by single moms, and I cringed at what I saw.

That's when I decided that I would build a stable support system for Aiden. A village so tight that he would refer to it as one thing -- family. He deserves it. All children do.

There's my sister and niece who are always around to play with Aiden, entertain him, or listen to his funny stories. There's my godmother who is always ready to listen to me vent, offer advice, or invite us for a weekend in suburbia. There are my girlfriends who love it when Aiden and I visit for dinner. There are my male friends who are ready and willing to play sports with Aiden or talk to him about "boy stuff," as cliché as that may sound.

As Aiden began describing his drawing to me in detail, it brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart. As I listened to him speak, his eyes wide and face bright with excitement, I had two thoughts:

We're so blessed.

And, even though I'm a single mom and Aiden's other parent is not in his life, we have exactly what I've always wanted for Aiden -- a family.

{Personal Style} Fall Transitions

soccer jeans, shirt, puffer vest: H&M; shoes: UGG Australia 

Confession: I still have my cabbage patch doll from when I was growing up. She came with me to college, several apartments after college, and is currently sitting on the rocking chair in my bedroom. She's a true pal and I love her!

That's why I was wildly excited when I received an invitation to the 30th anniversary celebration of Cabbage Patch Kids. Aiden and I headed to the Eventi hotel near Midtown Manhattan he experienced all things cabbage patch dolls. I was feeling all nostalgic and whatnot as I walked through the gallery to view the history of dolls.

Aiden was so afraid of the giant cabbage patch doll!

It was sunny and cool out, and Aiden wore the perfect Fall transition outfit -- jeans, a button-down shirt, and a vest.

At the event, Aiden took it upon himself to color his hair blue. Don't worry though -- it was only hair chalk. He then walked around the city asking me if he looked like a "cool kid." Indeed, Aiden. Indeed.

 Hope you guys are having a fabulous week and the beginning of the new season is treating you well.

Stay stylish! 

Finding Single Parent Love with Match.com

Photo via

Single ladies, brace yourself because your love life just got a little bit sexier. 

I know what you're thinking... 
"I don't have time to go on dates because I have children."
"Dating is expensive as a single mom because I have to pay for the babysitter."
"Sex?! What's that?!"

I've been there. Many times. But you really can have a fulfilling dating life and you really can find love as a single mom. You just need to be pointed in the right direction. 

Enter online dating. 

I know what you're thinking...
"Online dating is filled with a bunch of weirdos."
"I never meet anyone I'm interested in."
"I never meet anyone who's interested in dating a single mother."

I've been there too. Plenty of times. 

Remember the obnoxious lawyer guy? Oy! I've met some pretty weird people online and even closed my account for a few weeks because I needed to break-up with my online dating site. But, the tables always turn and things always start to look up. 

Enter Match.com. 

One-third of Match's members are single parents, and Match believes that just because you're a single parent doesn't mean that your search for love should be over. (No dry spells over here!) If you're afraid to jump on the online dating bandwagon, don't be. A recent study shows that 67% of men are willing to date a single mom. So... go ahead and get your Stella on. (That was a How Stella Got Her Groove Back reference.)

I had the chance to have some pressing questions answered by Match's relationship expert, Whitney Casey, and here's what she had to say:

Mommy Delicious: Are potential dates "scared off" when they find out you're a parent on your profile?

Whitney Casey: Actually, quite the opposite! We found that over 2/3 of single men are interested in dating a single parent. And even more, over 1/3 of members on Match are single parents themselves! The site is a simple way to put yourself out there with other singles like yourself, and without feeling you like you have to hide details about your life like single parenthood.

MD: How long do you think is an appropriate amount of time before letting a date know the circumstances that led to single parenthood?

WC: I’d challenge you to have at least two dates before you mention your children OR your past relationship. Though your past relationships DO affect the person you are today, you don’t have to invite your ex to your date. Once the topic does come up, give the 2-minute version – not every juicy detail – and move on to a new topic.  And remember, this is not the time to vent about your split -- turn to a supportive friend, a family member or a therapist instead.

MD: How long should single parents wait to introduce their dates to their child/children?

WC: I think it’s important for your kids to know you are dating again, but approach this topic with caution. This is a new situation for them too, so make sure your kids aren’t being introduced to a new date week after week – I think it’s best to make sure you and your partner are in a solid (read: monogamous) relationship before making the first intro. Also, depending on the age of your kids, I might suggest introducing your date as your “friend” whom you are excited for them to get to know. Of course this will all depend on how aware and supportive your children are about you getting back into the dating scene, but it’s a good starting point for any mom or dad.

MD: If a single parent is dating and ready to sleep with his/her date, how should they handle it if the single parent cannot sleep over because they need to relieve the babysitter? 

WC: It’s best to make your date aware of your schedule and plans at the beginning of the date, instead of the end of the date when you are trying to run out the door to relieve the babysitter.   A simple, “I am so excited we have 3 hours to spend together!” should do the trick.  

Let's take Whitney's tips and run with it... all the way to Match.com and into the online dating world. There's some great love prospects waiting to meet you.

Disclosure: This post is being sponsored by Match.com.

Your Dreams Should Scare You A Little

This week, I had a meeting with one of my students' mother. She is also a single mom, and a bit younger than I am. At one point in the meeting she said, "You're a single mother and you're so successful? You're such an inspiration!"

Then our conversation shifted a bit. We started talking about goals and dreams. She wants to go to college, earn her college degree, and start her career. But, she's scared because she's not sure if she will be able to successfully do it while having a daughter to take care of.

I encouraged her anyway. (After all, I'm blessed to be a blessing.) I told her that it might be a bit scary, but her dreams should be a little scary. If they're not a little scary, then they're too easy to accomplish.

I was scared when I decided to become a school leader. There were times when I thought that maybe I wasn't good enough to excel at this job. But I pushed pass those feelings of fear and doubt. I encouraged myself to keep going whenever necessary, and I grabbed on to my dreams. It wasn't easy. It still isn't easy.

But it's worth it.

Everyday I get to come to work and fulfill my purpose. Everyday I get to contribute to doing something so big and meaningful and personal to me -- closing the achievement gap.

It's a glorious feeling.

For a while I've been thinking about starting a weekly parenting group for the single mothers of my students, and having that conversation really gave me the push that I needed to get the ball rolling on this project.

I'm excited.

There's a need and I'm in a position to fill it, and that's exciting. But, I'm a little scared. Like I said to the single mother during our meeting, your dreams should scare you a little bit. That's a clear sign that it's a big dream and you'll have to work hard to achieve it. But that's okay -- don't be afraid of a little work.

So here's to dreaming big and working hard and pushing pass fear to accomplish our goals. All of them.

{Personal Style} Fall, Casually

 

blouse, belt, ring, stacked bracelets: H&M; cardigan, jeans, flats: GAP; 

necklace: Aldo accessories; sunnies: F21

This weekend, Aiden and I headed out to a kite festival downtown. Well, we headed out to the end of the kite festival. We spent so much time hanging around the house (both of us), going for a run (me), and relaxing (both of us), that we got to The Brooklyn Bridge Park late. It was still a great time though because we enjoyed brunch outdoors at The Brooklyn Bridge Garden Bar, views of Manhattan from Pier 1, and the play spaces all around.

 

The air was crisp and cool (hello Fall!), and I wore my typical Saturday afternoon get-up: denim skinnies, ballet flats, a blouse with a pop of color, and a cardigan. The top knot and sunnies were a must for a Saturday afternoon with my lil guy.

I forgot how much I loved the skinnies and ballet flats combo. It's super cute, comfortable, and casual, and always reminds me that Fall isn't so bad after all. (But it still doesn't stop me from missing Summer days. Le sigh.)

Hope you all had a great weekend. Have a stylish week. Stay fabulous!

This School Year, I Wish...

That Aiden's teachers will be kind, caring, loving, and understanding.

That Aiden will grow academically, his love for reading will increase exponentially, he'll get a great grasp of number sense, he'll enjoy science and history and writing. (Writing is always a tough one for him because he doesn't enjoy it as much and he's got lots of work to do with his handwriting.)

That he continue to be curious and ask lots of meaningful questions.

That he'll continue to explore and think critically.

That he'll think for himself and have the courage to speak up for what he believes in.

This year, I wish that Aiden's teachers will encourage him to be curious and think critically and explore and ask questions. Lots of them.

That his teachers won't get annoyed when he wants to know why things are the way that they are. Instead they'll give him a thumbs up and tell him to keep asking questions and keep growing his brain.

This year, I wish that Aiden will continue to be sweet and kind and caring to all of his friends. That he'll be understanding and flexible and contagiously optimistic.

That he'll make friends. And want to schedule play dates. And want to go to birthday parties.

That he'll continue to be resilient and push forward to achieve his goals.

That he'll learn to deal with his frustrations in an effective way. (You see, he's a perfectionist -- like his mama -- and when he can't get something right away, it frustrates him. A lot. But, we're working on it.)

That he'll continue to hone his skills in swimming and soccer and maybe even begin to love a new sport (I'm thinking karate or baseball.)

Above all, this year, I wish that Aiden will be happy. And come into his own even more.

It's going to be a great school year. I'm claiming it! He may be in a single parent household, but he's got me in his corner and I'd do the impossible for him. Twice.

Can't wait to watch him grow...

Don't Let Anything Break Your Spirit

I was sitting in my bedroom, writing out checks to pay some bills. After paying the third or fourth bill, I paused and had a moment of gratitude. I was paying all of the bills. In full.

I'm blessed. 

 

And everything is turning out quite alright. 

This month marks three years since I ended the relationship with my ex. It was toxic and it was about time that I face the facts and call it quits. He moved out, and I began to refill the empty spaces in my life... and my heart. 

It wasn't easy. None of it. 

The process of accepting that I chose the wrong person, the process of knowing that we weren't going to raise Aiden in a two-parent household, the process of knowing that my life had forever been changed, the process getting back on track with my career, the process of repairing my finances... 

I was in for some tough times. Scary times. But I was determined to make this new life work. My life depended on it. Heck, Aiden's life depended on it. 

I set the goal to finish grad school and re-start my career, and eventually lead a school to help others reach their fullest academic potential. Three years later, I completed the former, and I'mworking on the latter. 

Things are good. And I feel incredibly blessed. 

That toxic relationship broke a lot of things in me -- my confidence in my judgement and my ability to make sound decisions, my self-esteem, my finances. But the one thing that it didn't break was my spirit. 

 

I held on to that. Tight. 

 

And that's what gave me the strength and courage to move forward. That's what allowed me to keep going through my personal hell. That's what helped me practice resiliency. That's what helped me to make it through. 

I know some of you are going through tough times because I read and respond to your emails. All of them. But don't let it break your spirit. Push forward, bounce back, and pick up the pieces. It might be hard, but it won't be impossible. You can do it and your future depends on it. 

It is my hope and prayer that you too will be able to pause and have a moment of gratitude. Because, in the end, after all is said and done, you would be stronger, wiser, and more capable than you ever thought possible.

Spider-Man Turn Off The Dark

It was like high-flying acrobatics meets larger-than-life acting. The set was an amazing depiction of easily recognizable New York City locations, such as the Chrysler building and the Empire State Building.
 
There were moments of gasping -- lots of it. And there were moments of oohing, aahing, widening of  our eyes, and sitting at the edge of our seats to see what will happen next.

I'm talking about Spider-Man Turn Off The Dark, which is currently playing on Broadway.

Aiden and I received tickets to the show, and I was particularly ecstatic about taking him to see it because I'd heard so many great things about it. We had orchestra seating, which is a flying zone, and when I told Aiden that Spider-Man would be flying around in the theater, his enthusiasm totally matched mine. Actually, it exceeded mine. Spider-Man is one of his favorite characters and Aiden couldn't wait to see him "catch the bad guys," as he put it.

The show did not disappoint.

Although it was a bit lengthy for an almost six-year-old (the show is approximately 2 hours and 30 minutes long), it felt as though it was a good mixture of a child-friendliness and adult-themed. Aiden really enjoyed seeing Spider-Man in action, and I was a sucker for the love story.

The special effects are amazing. There was a really sweet moment when Spider-Man was running incredibly fast, and in order to depict it effectively, there were several Spider-Men utilized. Aiden thought it was so cool, and I thought it was so well-orchestrated. I was impressed.

The scenery and set are certainly highlights of the play. There is a 2D style of comic book paneling, which is beyond awesome. The final showdown between the hero and the villain will make you forget that the show was a little longer than expected and have you sitting in awe.

If you see the show, be prepared to sit a little longer than you'd expect. But be prepared to be wowed by the aerial stunts, specials effects, and amazing stunts.

Spider-Man Turn Off The Dark is currently playing at The Foxwoods Theatre in Times Square -- 213 West 42nd Street. Visit the website for more information on ticket purchases as well as show times.


Also, you can celebrate back-to-school with Spider-Man Turn Off The Dark! Spider-Man will be giving away limited edition Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark backpacks to all children who attend the show!* Aiden received a backpack when we attended the show, which was the icing on the cake to a lovely afternoon.

Buy a ticket today and collect your backpack at the Foxwoods when you come and fly high with your favorite New York superhero. You might even be the lucky winner of the weekly golden ticket which will win you and your party a tour backstage and a meet and greet with the webslinger himself!

 

*While stocks last.

{Disclaimer: I received complimentary tickets to the show in order to facilitate this review. All opinions expressed herein are my own.}

Time Out NY Kids Bloggers' Picks

New Yorkers, have you seen the September-October 2013 issue of Time Out New York Kids?! Not only is it filled with tons of free Fall activities for families and kids, but it also features cool classes that your children will love.

Plus...

Wait for it...

I spy Mommy Delicious and her cute little son on page 38. In this half-page spread, I'm talking about some of my fave kid-friendly NYC spots and what makes them so special to Aiden and me.

If you haven't already done so, pick it up at your local newsstand. And let me know if you agree with my picks!

{I was not compensated for this post.}

{Personal Style} The Swimsuit Issue

swimsuit: Victoria Secret | sunnies: F21

Hope you all had a great Labor Day!

We headed to Ocean City, NJ, where we stayed at a cute little Bed and Breakfast. It was my best attempt at soaking up the very last drops of the season.

Amidst walking the boardwalk, touring the town, riding the ferris wheel, and having a near-death experience on a too-fast-and-too-high-for-my-liking roller coaster, I had an easy, breezy, beachy day. (Yes, I'm afraid of roller coasters. And yes, I'm afraid of heights.)

On Sunday, I wore one of my favorite bright and bold one-piece swimsuits. The lace trimmings and open back makes it super sexy, while the color-blocked patterns makes it super trendy.

It totally screams Mommy Delicious.

At one point, it was just the sun, the water, and me. The sounds of the waves were so relaxing. It was... amazing. Totally what I needed in order to get ready for the hectic month of September.

I'm ready. And I know it's gonna be a great month. Who's with me?

Hope you all had a great holiday weekend! Have a lovely week!